As I continue this week to talk about The Five Love Languages, I want to mention each one and how it has impacted me personally in my relationships.

I figured I would begin with the one where I got 0%! Physical Touch!

I have a very long history with this one, and I will be honest, that “0%” absolutely stumped me! You see, I have taken this quiz many times throughout my life, and every time, physical touch has been the second and frequently the first love language. I knew I was beginning to change last year, but this was a result I never expected.

By way of a backstory, here’s a bit about relationships and me. It used to be extremely important to me when involved in a romantic relationship to have an abundance of physical touch. In fact, as far as women go, all the experts told me I had a higher than usual appetite for sex. At least, for a woman.

While I remained pure until marriage in the physical aspect of my relationship, my ex-husband knew how to use sex as a weapon when it came to our relationship. I never made any secret about how obsessed I was with the physical aspect of our relationship. He, on the other hand, was rarely ever interested. And he used that to his advantage.

Without going into details, let’s just say that God had to work on me for a long time to reduce my craving for physical touch. Even after my divorce, I still found myself dealing with lust and the intense desire for sex. It was a struggle that didn’t always manifest itself in the healthiest of ways, but I am grateful that I had enough fear of God to keep me from doing something I would have regretted.

I can still recall the day that I came to God, completely broken, and cried out, “I can’t do this anymore! Please deliver me from my desire to have sex!” I mean, I wasn’t married, and there was no way I would do anything about fulfilling that craving, but it was devouring me!!

Well, at some point, God did deliver me. And I tell ya when God delivers you, it’s complete!! While I would never turn down a hug or a kiss from a loved one, I no longer need physical touch for someone to prove their love to me. And it would seem that the quiz results reveal just how completely I have been delivered.

Let me say, however, if physical touch is your primary or secondary love language, it is NOT BAD!! It really depends on how it manifests itself. As a Christian, I believe that physical touch can be difficult for a single person. We know what the Bible says about sex outside of marriage, and I’m not here to preach at anyone. It is clear that any of these love languages can be warped and used to attack us. Physical touch in a relationship meets a profound need in us, especially in this age of COVID and technology. So even though I scored a zero on physical touch, it doesn’t mean I don’t look forward to the day when we can hug our loved ones openly again!

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